A Revealing Short Story

The  Cruel Spring and the Simple Passage of Time

                                         By Pete Schulte

It was late afternoon when I ducked into a bar I went to every now then. It was nothing fancy, just a place to have a beer or two if I had the time. I usually kept to myself and didn't see many familiar faces. But this day was different.

I recognized a guy sitting at the end of the bar and could see that he knew me as well. It was Randy Perkins. He was an old classmate a few years ahead of me. I gave a slight wave and reluctantly went down to meet him. “You didn't have to come over, Michael,” he said to me right off. It was always difficult with Randy Perkins…

Since I did come over he glumly offered the barstool next to him. I glumly accepted it. “So, how are you, Randy?” I asked him.

“Very well. Hey, why don’t I buy you a drink? You weren't so bad back then. You weren't so good either, but hey, I’ll still buy you a drink.”

“Thanks, Randy.”

Randy Perkins was known those years ago as a skinny oddball freak who dared to be different when being different could get you hurt. The other older kids had it in for him, a seething hatred and were just looking for an excuse. One day he gave them one.

I was hanging out with my buddies in a loose circle on our BMX bikes. Spring was everywhere but we had nothing better to do. Just then Jeremiah Roop rode up to us in breakneck speed before skidding to a halt. “Hey guys, guess what? The big kids caught Perkins in the park! He was picking flowers without his pants on. They've got him cornered. Let’s go!”

We raced to the park as fast as we could pedal. A guy caught picking flowers without his pants on? That was good stuff for bored kids. At the park we stopped and listened for any commotion in the dense brush. Finally we heard random shouts and laughter and found the older kids surrounding a large oak tree deep within the park. We quietly gathered behind the others and searched the giant oak for any sign of Randy. Sure enough he was up there, bare-assed as described by Jeremiah. “Get down here now, Perkins!” yelled Tony Crane, their tough guy leader. “Take your punishment!”

“Leave me alone!” Randy hollered back.

“Down here!” Tony commanded. “I’m afraid your flower picking days are over.”

Randy didn't budge, and it wasn't long before rocks and dirt clods started flying up to his perch within the branches. He didn't last long. We listened as the sick thud of rocks struck his paper-thin body, and suddenly branches were splitting and Randy Perkins landed with a hard thump on the ground. He didn't move a muscle, half of him naked and covered with welts and blood. We all thought he was dead. The older kids scattered without a word and so did we. It was Jeremiah Roop who finally stopped us from fleeing the scene. “Wait,” he said. “We can’t leave him like that. Let’s find some grown-ups. Let’s get him some help.”

With Jeremiah leading the way, we eventually found some construction guys to tell, and not long after we heard the sirens begin to wail. Help was on the way for Randy Perkins, and here I probably would have just pedaled away with the others if not for Jerry Roop. It hurt to face him, this Randy Perkins. It always did. “Randy,” I said to him, “how did you come back from all that?”

“From all what?”

“You know, the thing in the park…with the flower picking and the tree.”

“Oh, that,” he said. “Well, it was hard at first, especially the next few days at school.”

Randy Perkins was back in school the very next day after his fall from the tree. In those days you didn't miss much school -- for any reason. Kids would come by your house, and if you weren't projectile vomiting or bleeding profusely from the anus, you went to school. The thought was, if I have to get my ass to school, then your ass is going to be there as well.

“But you know, Michael, the best thing to happen after the tree thing was the simple passage of time. Other things happen in life. The world spins on. I mean, it was big news when you yourself took those pills and went down. It was big news…for about a week. Then we all went on our way. It’s sad to think about it like that, so you just stop thinking about it at all.”

“But what about you, Randy? Here you've done so well for yourself. I want to follow your example. You don’t seem to let the past creep in at all.”

“Michael, I will tell you this: I still love to pick flowers, and for that matter I like not wearing any pants. And anyone who has a problem with that can kiss my mother-fucking ass. How’s that for burying the past?”

The end. 

The Corn Starch Kid: A New Short Story by Pete

The Corn Starch Kid

                                  By Pete Schulte

He traveled a lot, got around. Always a new town or city, always on his own. He liked it that way. No one had any claims on him. His time was his own. At night he liked to go to bars. He didn't want anything fancy, but no dive bars either. Something in between would suit him fine.

He ducked into a place called Monty’s near the train station. It was cold and snowy outside so Monty’s would have to do. There were women there and that’s what he wanted. He drank gin and made small talk with the bartender. He waited until somebody came around. Somebody always came around. “What’s your name?” he asked above the loud country music when she came within earshot.

“Me?” she asked as she hovered near the bar. “Were you talking to me?”

“Yes,” he said. “I was going to buy you a drink but I wanted to get your name first.”

“Laverne’s the name,” she said. “What kind of drink you thinking of buying me?”

“Well, I’m having a gin and tonic. Would you like one as well?”

“Don’t mind if I do,” said Laverne.

Laverne had big hair and a big body. He liked them that way. He liked Laverne just fine. He liked her even more when she asked if he’d like to come home with her. Really, he thought, was there any doubt?

Laverne’s apartment was small but neat. If he ever stopped his rambling ways, this was a place he could see himself in. But now wasn't the time for such thoughts. Now was the time to get Laverne in bed. “You want me to make you another drink?” she asked him.

“No,” he replied. “I want to take you to your room. I want to undress you. I want to make love to you.”

“Wow, Speedy Gonzales in the flesh here. You sure don’t waste any time. A girl‘s got to put on her track suit with you around.”

“Or take it off,” he added.

Laverne shrugged. She took him by the hand and led him into her bedroom. True to his word, he immediately undressed Laverne and put her down on the bed. She pulled the sheets up to her chin and waited for him to join her. He then surprised her by pulling out of his pocket a baggie filled with white powder. “Hey, what’s that stuff?” asked Laverne. “Better not be cocaine because I don’t do no drugs.”

“It’s not cocaine,” he said.

“Oh yeah? Then what is it?”

“It’s corn starch.”

“Corn starch?” said Laverne. “What are you doing, baking a cake?”

“No,” he replied. “I’m going to rub it on your body. It’ll feel good.”

“Corn starch on me?” she said. “What am I, a lump of gravy?”

“No.”

“Corn starch on me?” she repeated. “What am I, a can of soup?”

“No.”

“Corn starch on me?“ she repeated yet again. “What am I, a custard dessert?”

“Look,” he said, “it washes off easy. I think you’ll like it.”

“I think I’ll be vacuuming for a week,” she said.

He ripped the sheet from her body. She covered herself as best she could. “No, you don’t need to do that,” he said. “It won’t hurt you at all.” He drizzled the cool corn starch from her neck to her knees. He rubbed it into her skin. She said to him, “It feels like if I roll around some I’ll turn into a giant burrito.”

“No, you’re fine,” he said to Laverne. “You feel good and I feel good.” He then undressed himself and got on top of her. Afterwards she said to him, “Well, you look like a powdered donut but that sure was fun. Say, what was your name again?”

“They call me the Corn Starch Kid. I don‘t go anywhere without my corn starch.”

“The Corn Starch Kid?” said Laverne. “Now I've heard everything. But hey, Corn Starch, let’s say we do it again, okay?”

The end…until the next town anyway. 

A Cosmic Short Story

It’s Just the Moon

                           By Pete Schulte

They were traveling back to earth in their shuttle, the Lunastrata. They had no passengers, only cargo. Tourist travel to the moon had dried up thanks to the opening of Mars. Moon novelty had worn off months ago. After the taking in the view and doing some shopping, there really wasn’t much to do up there. So they were coming home, for the last time, or at least until they could catch on with a Mars shuttle. One pilot didn’t mind so much. For the other though, it was devastating. You see, he loved the pilot sitting next to him. He loved their time on the moon, so far away from the headaches back on earth. Oh to be on the moon again, he thought, in their little room with a view of deep space, a billion stars shimmering, shooting stars they could almost reach out and catch.

Pilot Colten Rahway was married. Well, sort of. His wife Debbie left him after ’Seeing the Light.’ This was the new thing to do on earth. If you wanted permanent happiness, all you had to do was go into a room and stare at this special light for 30 minutes. That was it. Permanent happiness. Everyone was doing it. Which was fine for Debbie, but she said to Colten, “How can I be married to you or anyone else when I’m now married to the universe?”  The entire universe. How could he compete with that? So Debbie left him and everything else in her life. She was off painting the world with other happy people, painting one another or some other kind of hippy shit. Colten didn’t even know if he had a home to return to. These blissed out people just left everything behind.

Pilot Sarah Jackson was also married, happily enough except for the moon affair with Colten. She had a husband named Steve and two small children. Pilot Sarah Jackson thought, “We’re only halfway home. I’m going to give this pilot next to me the best backseat sex of his life, if only he’d knock off the sad sack routine.” Pilot Sarah Jackson did not tolerate melancholy. She was upbeat and excited about returning home.

“I wish we could turn around and go back,” said Colten.

“Are you kidding me?” replied Sarah. “There’s nothing left up there but some mining. It’s over for the moon.”

“But we had each other,” he said. “I guess that’s what I’ll really miss.”

“Remember what I told you, and what we agreed upon? When this is over, we’re over. You got it? I have babies at home. I have a husband.”

“But I love you,” said Colten. “I didn't want to love you but I was lonely. I wanted your companionship and yes, your sex. But here I am in the middle of outer space and I love you so much. You’re my kitten.”

“Look,” she replied, “if things were different. If things were different, but they’re not. They’re not different. There are certain facts about this life. We talked about this and you said you understood.”

“I know. I know.”

Sarah held his hand and then leaned over and kissed him. Then she took him into what constituted the backseat and rocked his world, or whatever world or in between world they were currently in. Afterwards, their bodies spent but still intertwined, Colten harkened back to the moon. Always back to the moon. “I love this view of the moon,” he’d said to Sarah after one of their couplings, she face down on the bed.

“What are you talking about?” she’d replied. “It’s just dull gray with ragged edges.”

“I was talking about your ass.”

“Oh, that’s funny,” she’d replied, but didn't laugh at all.

Colten considered that Debby always laughed at his jokes even when they weren't all that funny. But Debby left him. So Sarah never laughed. Perhaps he should be with someone more serious-minded? Sarah looked over at Colten, as if reading his mind. “You know, when I get home I’m going to See the Light. We all are, Steve and the kids.”

“No,” said Colten. “That’s awful. Don’t do it.”

“Why not?” she replied. “Don’t you want to be permanently happy? There are no side effects. There’s no downside.”

“I don’t trust it.”

“Come on, Colten. Just see the light. Then you wouldn’t be such a grumpy grump and a sippy sap.”

“I’m not a grumpy grump. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I mean, look at us. We’re stark naked in outer space. We just had cosmic sex. Nothing touches us.”

“It will,” she said, “when we get home.”

“I think though, when I get extremely happy I get careless, I make mistakes. As a pilot, you can’t make mistakes. You know that.”

“But I think,” said Sarah, “that if you’re both competent and confident you won’t make mistakes. And if I can be happy all the while…”

“It’s too good to be true.”

“Grumpy grump,” said Sarah.

After they landed safely at the space port in Denver, Colten was ready for his famous final scene with Sarah, his big good-bye, their last soft kiss. Then he saw big Steve and the kids bounding up the shuttle, their faces beaming, their arms extended, awaiting hugs from their mother, Pilot Sarah Jackson. All Colten could manage was a faint wave, which she returned, more faintly then his own.

Colten drove back to his home but somebody else was living there. He tried asking about Debby but the person at the door was making no sense at all. They sure were happy though. Colten was certain that they’d seen the light. He ended up checking into a hotel where he’d stay a few days to gather his thoughts, to plan his next move.

In the daylight hours he found a park that he liked, where he walked for miles and sat in the sun. He thought about Sarah and the domestic life she so easily returned to. He had nothing but a memory of her and that had to be enough. “When this is, we’re over,” she’d said to him and meant it. Colten turned his gaze to the mountains. He didn’t expect it but there it was, the moon. It was full and steady and hung high above the broad peaks. He gazed at it and couldn’t remove his eyes. He was entranced. How many times had be been to the moon? Yet still entranced. Another walker ambled up and took notice of Colten‘s fixation. “Hey, buddy, what are you lookin’ at? It’s just the moon.”

Colten snapped out of his reverie and regarded the man before him. “Yeah,” he said with a shrug, “it’s just the moon.”

The end.

**Coming soon…Colten goes to Mars.